Hey guys, haven't talked to you all in a while. I know that I make a lot of journals, so sorry if I clog up your inbox a lot ^^' What's up with y'all lately? I haven't been on this a lot, mostly been on instagram (you should follow me guys, it's JJmyster22 haha) like the filthy hipster I am.
What's new with me lately? Well. Guess what? I'M GOING TO THE WORLDS FINALS IN KOREA!!! It's my seventeenth birthday present and you have NO IDEA how excited I am. Please NA, pull your shit together and beat the Koreans u_u I've been madly dancing around and bragging to everyone about this
School is really tough. Honestly, the IB system is much more different than the AP system than I thought. It's been a little difficult to adjust, and I'm getting much worse grades than I'm used to but I'm managing and I should be able to get back to my usual Asian-ness. I've only cried twice, which is pretty big considering what a crybaby I usually am, yeah?
Honestly, lately I've just been questioning a lot of things in my life. There was a period of time (and by that I mean the last two or three weeks) where I was just thinking to myself, "What am I doing here?" Because you know, I decided to move to Vietnam and was the one who asked to go to the school and move and everything. It was so stressful that first two months that I was just feeling really depressed and had no idea what I was doing.
BUT! I'm getting back in the swing of things. I've joined MUN (Model United Nations) and I'm going to Singapore this November for a conference. I joined Forensics Club and I signed up to be an MC for United Nations Day (basically I get to call out country names in front of everyone in my school which is a nice 1000 or so I think). So, I'm definitely getting involved with school and I think that if I just apply myself more, I'll get my grades back up to my usual standard.
Fun stuff too, so I'm not all academic. I went to the first party of the year and I plan to go to the rest of the parties. I've made friends and I go out occasionally and hang out (only with two people right now, because I'm still trying to find a clique or a group of people to consistently hang out with because I've already done the whole flitting from group to group and being independent yada yada). But anyways, the point is that I'm not all just studies and serious stuff. Plus, you know. League. And ice-skating. So yeah, coolio.
But High School isn't my only concern. I'm nearly seventeen and I've been thinking of college and the future for years. I always thought I knew what I wanted to do. I thought that I wanted to run my own video game company. And a part of me still wants that. I know for sure (or at least, I've known for three years and I haven't wavered at all; I've actually gotten more into it) I want to be in the gaming industry. Figuring out which part is the hardest. Obviously if I wanted to start a business, it would be a long time coming and I'd have a different job so I guess I'm really talking about my major. I always thought I'd go into Computer Science and earn an MBA but now I'm wondering what I REALLY want to do. Anyone who's actually reading this far, sorry it's so long and whiney and indecisive.
Honestly, I'm REALLY into the idea of shout casting, or being a host, or something (I'm really inspired by Sjokz actually). I absolutely adore public speaking, I love games (mostly LoL though so I'd have to broaden my horizons if I wanted variety or Riot rejects me if I decide to ever do this), and I love being part of a community. The issues with this would be that I'm clueless in this area (all my research went to Computer Science majors and that sort of stuff), I don't know if my mom would be supportive (she's spent so much money on me that I want to make it worth her while), and I don't know how stable a career path this could be (I'm assuming that it's not).
Another thing I'm interested in is character design and the artistic side of games. I love watching play-throughs, viewing stills, etc of games because it's so fascinating and just so gorgeous (usually). Also, the obvious: I like to draw. The problem with this is that I've made absolutely no effort to go into Art, I actually hate art classes, seems like a really sketchy area to go into (as in, unstable work), and again I'm clueless about this area.
So yeah. There are other options I've been thinking about but I don't know what I want and I'll need to think more. Please please please give me advice if you have anything helpful to say (unless you're saying stuff like "just stay in school you'll figure it out" or "school is important" or "you're young you have plenty of time" or "work hard" etc. . . Because honestly, obvious. I'm smart enough that I can at least do all that).